Confidence can be a tough thing to build up but if you develop your self-Confidence can help you connect with others effortlessly.
Trusting others, such as family and friends, can reassure us, make us think that we will be helped when we need it.
It’s the foundation of any healthy relationship, but unfortunately we can’t rely on anyone 100%.
This doesn’t mean we have to isolate ourselves or harden our hearts, but it does underscore the importance of being able to trust the one person we know we can count on: ourselves.
Yep, the person you need to trust first is yourself! No one can support you as much as you.
Being kind to yourself increases your self-confidence and decreases your need for approval.
What is Self-Confidence?
Self-confidence allows you to take care of your needs and your safety.
This means that you trust yourself to survive any situation but also that you practice kindness, not perfection. How to recognize a man in love who hides his feelings?
To have confidence in yourself is to refuse to leave yourself to your fate.
Here are other examples that encompass self-confidence:
- Be aware of your thoughts and feelings and express them;
- Follow your personal standards and your code of ethics;
- Know when to take care of yourself first;
- Knowing that you can survive mistakes, you pick up and try again;
- Pursue what you want without stopping or allowing yourself to be limited by others.
If you don’t do these things, you’ve never done it alone.
The problem is, the majority of us haven’t learned to trust ourselves as kids. Instead, we were taught to be addicted.
Confidence however is to be seen as a skill that we can all learn.
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Build self-confidence in order to make better life choices
Have you ever had that instinctive feeling that told you something was wrong? Maybe it didn’t make sense and you couldn’t explain it but you knew deep down that something was wrong.
It was your inner voice speaking to you.
Whether you call it intuition or instinct, listening to yourself is a key part of personal development.
In fact, one of the most important things you can do to build your self-confidence is to start REALLY listening to your intuition.
The problem is, it’s not always easy to listen to yourself.
You might be questioning your intuition, feeling like you can’t trust yourself to make good decisions because you’ve made mistakes in the past.
But when you feel comfortable enough to trust your inner voice, you can remove a lot of doubt and uncertainty from your life.
In this article, I explain how you can trust yourself more to make decisions in life, without feeling insecure.
Why We Don’t Trust Each Other
There is no doubt that we all want to do things the right way.
No one likes to make mistakes, so we try to avoid them at all costs.
Because we fear making mistakes, we often seek advice and answers to help us avoid making the wrong decision.
I’m sure you’ve had those times when you thought you could do something on your own and then the fear starts to show up and bang, you’re in doubt, denying your own abilities.
Because of this, you ask for advice or search Google for a step-by-step guide to help you solve your problems.
The problem with seeking advice is that it often pushes back what you already know to be true.
The search for answers can also cloud your mind and make you even more confused than before.
You might even make a decision knowing full well that it is not the right choice (only to regret it afterwards).
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Listen to your intuition
Our intuition is something that we just don’t give enough credit to.
There are so many times we have a hunch about something but just don’t listen to it.
We try to rationalize it but there is not always a rational explanation!
Accepting this is one of the most difficult but most important things to recognize. Not all feelings need to be rationalized or over-analyzed.
No matter who is around you and what these people think they can do for you, no one knows you like you know yourself.
You can trust your intuition because it comes from you, from emotional and physical signs that you are feeling internally.
Remember that a lot of your instincts come from your own personal experiences.
You are receiving signals from your unconscious brain because it has already been faced with the situation and knows when to send you positive or warning signs.
So how do you reconnect with your intuition and develop your self-confidence?
1. Spend quiet time alone
I firmly believe that you already have most of the answers you need within you. You know more about yourself and the world than you might think.
But … But lost in the daily turmoil, you end up forgetting this basic truth.
It’s time to spend some quiet time alone.
Get a better understanding of yourself.
Do you really know yourself? Do you feel like you really understand who you are?
Most people, if they answer honestly, will say no.
While spending more time alone might not give you the full answer to this question, it can certainly give you a much better understanding of how you really feel about the things that are going on in your life.
You can discover more of your abilities, your passions, your interests and even your dislikes.
Surely you will have a better idea of yourself, who you are and where you fit in the world.
It builds self-confidence and by extension, a better chance of reconnecting with your intuition.
2. Trust yourself even when you make mistakes
You have probably heard of “unconditional love” before.
Perhaps this was mentioned in relation to the bond a parent has with their child or the love that exists between siblings or between life partners.
But did you know that it is also very important to love yourself unconditionally?
Loving yourself unconditionally means letting go of negative thoughts about yourself. Above all, it is getting rid of all self-criticism after making a mistake.
Start by keeping a close eye on your inner voice and how it reacts to your actions.
Is she nice or mean? Is it open or critical?
When you can love yourself unconditionally, you can trust yourself unconditionally.
If you start to feel uncomfortable around other people, remember that it’s okay to be YOU.
Start by training with the people you feel most comfortable with, such as your friends and close family.
Take note if you feel vulnerable or uncomfortable. Then continue spending time with these people until your feelings of insecurity start to go away.
Also stop convincing yourself that you trusted your intuition and that it led you down the wrong path.
I’m pretty sure the action you took was not REALLY what your intuition was telling you to do.
You’ve probably been listening to your ego (the part of you that people like and dislikes change) and not your intuition.
But you can make mistakes no matter what.
You need to understand that mistakes are part of the journey and that they always offer learning opportunities.
If you can trust yourself even though you have made mistakes, you will be able to create a lot more peace in your life.
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3. Let yourself be felt without trying to rationalize your feelings
Since intuition is defined as “the ability to understand something instinctively, without the need for conscious reasoning”, over-analysis is one of its biggest enemies.
Putting excessive thought into every decision and thinking about the countless scenarios and outcomes can take you out of your gut.
Especially when you are overthinking something to rationalize or justify something.
In these cases, your thought process is not going freely or naturally.
The flood of possibilities and considerations that over-analysis generates can overwhelm you and make you more confused.
As a result, you find yourself in a dizzying circle of questions that follow one another and give no clear direction.
This condition is called analytical paralysis. Whatever the exact process, over-thinking will get you to the same place: disconnected from your gut feelings.
It’s easier to make sense of thoughts than feelings.
But your intuition just isn’t something you can rationalize.
Sometimes you just can’t explain why you are in doubt about certain things.
But when you overthink what your inner voice is telling you instead of just listening to it, you only add judgment and self-doubt to the mix.
Get started, one day at a time!
Remember that trusting your intuition and gaining confidence in general is a journey that will often bring you back to the same starting point.
This is normal, do not be discouraged!
Think of your self-confidence as a muscle to build.
With focused practice and frequent use, it will become more powerful and better serve its purpose of guiding you to yourself.
